How to overcome shyness?

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How to overcome shyness?

Lack of confidence in an action, a realization that occurs in relation to others, shyness is an attitude that can manifest in all areas of life. One can exhibit shyness at work, at school, with family, and elsewhere.

When we are characterized by a spirit of shyness, it can be a real hindrance to achieving our goals. Many people are affected by shyness. It can be more or less exacerbated depending on the person and the situation.

However, it is very common and has a strong power of nuisance and weakness. Are you characterized by a spirit of shyness? Then, it would be very important for you to overcome your shyness. How to overcome shyness? Follow this article for more information.

Where can shyness manifest?

While living, human beings go through several areas in their lives. Everywhere, we are led to live and communicate with others. While being characterized by a spirit of shyness, it can be felt wherever we are. This is the reason why we have:

Shyness in class: the child or student who exhibits it expresses themselves softly, very softly, and sometimes does not express themselves at all. However, oral expression in class is very important to stay motivated in school and excel in studies. This is why it is important for a student to overcome shyness.
Shyness in public: you are afraid to speak in public, to express yourself in order to give your opinions on subjects. Your inner self limits you from participating in public exchanges. You can chase this shyness away if you have the motivation to do so.
Shyness at work: this prevents you from expressing yourself in the performance of your duties. You have difficulty communicating with your colleagues. It will be very important for you to combat it. Because this shyness will affect your motivation at work leading to negative outcomes. You need to interact with your colleagues to feel better and also to learn better.

What are the origins and causes of shyness?

Is shyness an innate feeling? Does it arise from poor upbringing? We must understand that shyness has origins. Here are some origins and causes of shyness for you:

Do we are born with shyness?

It must be said that some people are more easily intimidated than others. But, this cannot be a 100% valid reason to explain shyness in an individual. Some people rely on physical attributes to explain the origin of extreme shyness in an individual.

These include stuttering, short stature, unattractiveness, etc. This reasoning is as inadequate as it is absurd. Because one can be filled with a spirit of shyness not due to a defect, but because of our qualities.

The family environment

The family environment where a person (child) grows up can undoubtedly influence and cause shyness. If a person has shy parents, they can transmit this shyness to their child.

Similarly, if the child lives in a family where they are repressed, weakened, or destabilized by family members, one can expect them to have excessive shyness. It is no secret that we will have a child withdrawn into themselves.

And as they grow up, this shyness will persist. We will then have a very shy person in adulthood. Promoting perfect family communication is fighting against such behavior in our children in adulthood.

Culture

This can also be the origin of a person’s shyness. Finding oneself in a society that adopts a culture different from your own can lead to a certain form of shyness. Transculturation and uprooting are also at the origin of shyness in an individual.

A traumatic event

An event that has traumatized your mind, you felt vulnerable. Your psyche remains traumatized by these difficulties you have faced. Therefore, you fear that these moments will repeat.

Hyper shyness due to these events causes you to withdraw into yourself, and you are filled with fear. This is proof that you lack self-confidence and have not overcome your shyness.

Why is shyness a flaw?

A very shy individual has difficulty devoting themselves. They withdraw into themselves. They do not express their deep opinion in the face of a situation. One could qualify them as a hypocritical person.

It is true that it is sometimes said that to gain respect, one must be reserved. But when this becomes excessive, it puts you on the margins of your environment and excludes any relationship. Humidity then turns into aridity.

Shyness in a person can generate defects. Such as, lack of courage, lack of coherence, negativity, and also misanthropy. While having excessive shyness, you may sometimes accept the unacceptable.

Thus, you harm yourself by being hyper shy. Shyness diminishes you and makes you fall below yourself. It diverts you from what you desire to be.

Is shyness a disease?

Shyness or hyper shyness is not a psychological disease. It is simply a character trait influenced by life experiences, by external or internal factors, and is quite a natural state.

It becomes a handicap for some people when they struggle to overcome it. Therefore, this shyness becomes a real obstacle for projects, for social life, and even for success.

Extreme shyness can also, in some cases, take on pathological aspects. The hyper shy person may therefore suffer from constant distress, a weakness of self-confidence, isolation, or sometimes aggressive behavior.

Of course, the causes of shyness vary from person to person, but they are all due to childhood accumulations and life experiences.

In general, a child who grew up in a family environment (overcrowded) where they could not find their place and especially be heard becomes a shy adult. There are others that can lead to the expression of shyness.

The most important thing in the case of shyness is the perspective we have on those who suffer from excessive shyness. While seeing themselves as people who do not deserve respect and appreciation, we witness a behavior of isolation from these individuals.

Symptoms of pathological shyness

When does shyness become pathological? It becomes so when it penalizes, also leads to a surge of anxiety and avoidance of others. In this case, behavioral therapy is necessary, for therapeutic exercises with a psychologist specialized in shyness.

They can provide solutions for the well-being of the individual. The subject manifests it through visual symptoms. These symptoms are similar to those of anxiety. They are therefore:

Nausea
Dizziness or lightheadedness
Tingling or numbness in the limbs
Sleep disturbances
Inability to react appropriately when the situation arises
Feeling of fear, worry, panic, or discomfort
Heart palpitations
Sweating (clammy hands, hot flashes…)
Trembling
Shortness of breath, dry mouth
Sensation of choking
Chest pain
Inhibitory behaviors during most social interactions

What therapy for shyness?

Cognitive and behavioral therapies are recommended to provide solutions for shy people. These are therapies that do not aim to profoundly change the entirety of a personality through a long and constraining cure.

They aim to modify a behavior that is harmful to the life of the person suffering from excessive shyness. It is also possible to refer to a shyness coach to provide solutions.

There are also other therapies for shyness. These include: hypnosis, self-hypnosis, graphic autosuggestion, visualizations, light therapy, psychogenealogy, psychosurgery, …

How to overcome shyness?

Have you ever asked yourself the question: why overcome shyness? It is important for everyone to overcome their shyness. Because it could be a real hindrance to their personal development, to achieving their goals in life, and also to their social life. Whatever the cause or origin of this shyness installed in you, you must manage to treat it so that it leaves your life. Do you want to be cured of this shyness? Then, here are some ideas that may be useful to you.

Be patient and persistent

Do not rush through life, skipping certain stages. Take it slowly. Because success can sometimes take time before it presents itself to you. You can manage to overcome this shyness.

But, it may take a while. You may sometimes have relapses; however, always stay motivated, because overcoming shyness is an achievable goal and a realistic mission.

Act progressively

Do not expose yourself directly to the situation that creates this shyness in you. Because this could further increase your state of shyness. Instead, proceed through successive steps, while placing yourself in a situation that worries you a little.

Be lenient with yourself

So take the time to take a break, and engage again.

Understand your shyness

What type of shyness characterizes you? By knowing this, you can better orient yourself to treat it.

Beyond these different points, here are other effective techniques that can also help you: